the writeous babe project

Blog Like a Girl: Courtney Mirenzi of Those Graces

2012-03-21T07:00:00.001-05:00

Courtney Mirenzi of Those Graces

I stumbled upon Courtney Mirenzi's blog Those Graces a few weeks ago and, to be honest, when I found it I felt giddy. Those Graces is something I'd been looking for for years -- a feminist fashion blog.

Recently I had a chat with Courtney about her decision to add a feminist slant to her style blog and her social media success.

You decided to add a feminist slant to your blog about a year ago, right? How did that affect your blog’s readership?

I made the decision to incorporate feminism into my blog a little over a year ago. (Read about her decision here.) Since then, I've been incorporating feminist issues relating to body image, how to buy makeup with ethics and many more. I think what I ultimately learned from changing course is that a blog could and should be what the writer wants it to be. At the end of the day, most of us blog as a hobby and it can often be stifling to stick to just a few narrow topics.

As far as my readership, it definitely went up after I made a conscious effort to share more of my opinions on feminism and women's issues. As someone who reads a lot of blogs, my favorites are the ones that really open up and address hard hitting questions. In posts where I've shared my thoughts and feelings on difficult topics--those are the ones people love to read and share their opinions on. I want my blog to be a place where people can share their thoughts.

How do you reconcile your passion for fashion with your feminist beliefs?

Being a feminist definitely makes me take a second look at the world I see around me including fashion and feminism. It has made me look at issues more critically, which has in turn driven me to speak out about issues you don't often see on fashion blogs. Ultimately, I think any person has a wealth of interests, some of which might conflict. I think the key is just keeping an open mind and skeptical eye on the world around you.

What advice would you give to aspiring bloggers considering writing about fashion with a feminist slant?

I went into blogging with this very rigid idea of what my blog would be. I started off as a budget fashion blogger, but over time I learned that my blog can really be anything I want it to be. For anyone wanting to write a blog about fashion with a feminist slant--I would say be open to change and don't be afraid to switch directions or talk about things that may seem unpopular or controversial.

When it comes to beauty and feminism one of the things I’m really concerned about is how we as women can improve our self-image and work to help build the self-esteem of young girls. Any thoughts on this topic?

I think the best thing that women can do for each other is just be honest. For years there seemed to be this wall up where self help "experts" didn't admit their own flaws or feelings. I think it's important to share with other women that we may feel down on ourselves or degrade ourselves due to unhappiness with our appearance. The second you just open up and be yourself, the quicker other women will relate to you and the easier it is to help. I think making self-image and self-esteem part of everyday conversation is also important.

You and your blog were recently featured in the Boston Globe. Congratulations! What general advice would you give to bloggers looking to get their names out there?

Thank you so much! You know, it's a funny thing. The writer of the article literally emailed me out of the blue and asked me if she could interview me. Sometimes good things truly do just happen out of no where!

My advice to bloggers is to respect your readers because they are your community and the most important people (aside from yourself!) at the end of the day when it comes to your blog. If you build a strong community, good things will come.

Cross posted at GeorgiaMae.com.

7 Steps to Successful Public Speaking

2012-03-14T07:00:00.001-05:00

Image via Creative Commons

In 2010 Vikki Grodner of the Birmingham-based event planning company The Grodner Group started what she calls New Girls Network. Grodner told The Birmingham News that the New Girls Network is "our version of the good ol' boys network, a way for women to gather and learn from each other."

New Girl Network events are designed to help professional women network with their peers; Grodner also uses the group to offer educational sessions to help women in their careers.

Yesterday I attended a New Girls Network event for the first time eager to learn from guest speaker Donna Francavilla. Francavilla, a veteran radio broadcast journalist, also owns Frankly Speaking Communications, a company that provides consulting and training in media communications and presentations.

Having good public speaking skills is important regardless of your profession. Like or not introverted writers, you never know when you'll have to give a presentation at work or maybe even discuss your book or blog on the local news. Francavilla essentially keeps her clients from looking and sounding stupid.

Here are a few tips I picked up from her talk yesterday. I present 7 steps to successful public speaking:

1. Do your research. Whatever the topic of your talk or interview may be, your goal, Francavilla said, is to sound like an expert. But don't panic. For a short TV or radio spot knowing just 5 minutes worth of information on your subject will help you sound as if you really know your stuff.

2. Don't forget fashion. If you're speaking before a group or on television you need to chose the right outfit. Seriously. While crazy shoes, dangly earrings, and eye-catching head wear may be distracting, Francavilla recommends wearing bold, bright colors. These shades help you appear more confident. Also, be sure to wear something you feel good in.

3. Practice. How you sound is important. Duh! So make sure you enunciate and project your voice. Record and listen to yourself to figure out ways you can improve.

4. Be hands on. I'm a person who talks with my hands, something I always thought was a problem. Francavilla, however, says it's not. Natural hand gestures make you seem more open and approachable.

5. Make eye contact. Don't be scared!

6. Think of Mom. OK, so let's say you are scared. One thing Francavilla says can help calm you is to imagine you're speaking to someone you care about.

7. Ask yourself, what would Jesus do? No, I'm not saying you need to preach to your audience. Francavilla says the best speakers, the best communicators are not only authentic and relatable, but they're also good storytellers. She gave political examples such as President Barack Obama and President Ronald Reagan. And Francavilla reminded us that one of the reasons Jesus' message was so powerful was because he spoke in parables. Yeah, he performed miracles, but the man could tell a good story. So people listened.

If you live in Birmingham click here to join the New Girls Network mailing list.

Monday Motivation from Benjamin Franklin

2012-03-12T08:05:00.001-05:00

"Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing." -- Benjamin Franklin

Weekend Links: Sunday Reads

2012-03-11T11:06:00.001-05:00

Hope you all have had a fabulous weekend so far. Here are a few links to check out during your down time this Sunday:

Facebook recently announced that Pages will switch over to the new Timeline layout that is currently on most profiles on March 30. If you have a Facebook page for your blog (which I hope you do) here's how the new layout can actually help your blog.

If you're thinking about starting a second blog, read this first.

Liz Henry at The Six-Year Itch explains why she refuses to call herself a mommy blogger.

My Latest Clutch Magazine Article and My New Fitness Goals

2012-03-08T08:00:00.001-06:00

Photo by Rachel Kramer Bussel
Image via Creative Commons

In my latest article for Clutch magazine I discuss ways adults, particularly women, can help empower teen girls to have a more positive and healthy self image. While I think we should offer words of encouragement, we also need to walk the talk and be good examples of self-confident women. This means, as I state in my article, not complaining about our weight or waistlines (something I'm very guilty of) in front of young girls and having an active lifestyle. I have learned that one of the best ways to feel good about my body is to focus on what it can do instead of how it looks (which is why I ran 13.1 miles in below freezing temperatures last month).

Last year, after being weight obsessed for months, I got rid of my scale. I decided to replace my goal of "lose 25 pounds" with "complete a half marathon." And I did it!

After my race I knew I would need a new fitness goal or I'd get fixated on my weight once again. But I couldn't think of one. I thought of nine! And I'm posting them here so you all can help keep me accountable. Here goes...

1. Make weight training a habit.
I hate lifting weights. It's boring, it hurts, and too many of the machines require that you stick your butt up in the air for all the gym rats to see. But alas, I know strength training is good for me. Studies show it takes 21 days to form a habit. So I'll consider this goal accomplished once I do weight training three times a week for three consecutive weeks. (Keep in mind this will probably take me until the end of the year.)

2. Conquer my fear of Body Pump.
From step to spinning to dance aerobics, I love group fitness classes, except for one class -- Body Pump. I hate this class. Why? Because it's a weight lifting class. Well, it's a torture chamber disguised as a weight lifting class. But I'm determined to one day become a Body Pump regular. One day.

3. Run a 10-minute mile.
I'm a tortoise on the trail.

4. Complete a 5K in 30 minutes.

5. Complete a 10K in an hour.

6. Complete a half marathon in 2.5 hours.
Yes, I actually plan to put my body through that again.

7. Do 50 push ups without taking a break.
21-year-old Javacia could do this. 31-year-old Javacia is lucky to do 5 push-ups without stopping.

8. Obtain my group fitness instructor certification, again.
I miss being a certified fitness fanatic!

9. Obtain my personal trainer certification.
This has been a dream of mine for over a decade.

What are your fitness goals?

The Art of Focus: How to Discover Your Niche

2012-03-07T08:00:00.001-06:00

Photo by Mark Hunter
Image via Creative Commons

Ask me about my websites and I will most likely tell you that I'm a lifestyles blogger. But lately I've realized that for me "lifestyles blogger" is the answer I give instead of saying "Frankly, I have no idea what my blog is about!" Now, I'm not saying this is the case for all lifestyles bloggers. In fact, pretty much all my favorite blogs would fall under that category. But even lifestyles blogs, the good ones at least, have focus, something I've struggled to find in my 3+ years of blogging.

In last month's issue of Upscale magazine Angel Laws, founder of the internationally recognized celebrity blog ConcreteLoop.com, offered a few tips for finding your niche. She recommended making a list of five things that really interest you then mixing up a a couple of those into a topic that has your personal touch.

I am very interesting in women's issues, faith, fitness, race matters, and maintaining healthy friendships and relationships. I've always wanted to have a blog about feminism, but one that all women would feel comfortable visiting and one that also explored my Southern values and how I work to reconcile them with my feminist ideals. My plan is to slowly move my other blog, GeorgiaMae.com, in this direction.

As for this blog, I decided to to follow the advice of Jeff Goins. I'm currently taking his free blogging tutorial Intentional Blogging (which I highly recommend). He suggests a three step process to discovering your niche. First, choose your subject based on your passion. Next, choose a theme, which is a particular area of concentration within your topic. Then you'll decide on your objective. What do you want to accomplish with your blog? What's your goal?

Here's my objective for this blog:

To help women writers achieve their goals as I share inspiring (and sometimes funny) stories of my journey to make my own writing dreams come true.

Ta-da! I have a niche.

So why is it so important to have a niche? I think it can be liberating. In the past I have felt so stressed about my other blog because I felt it necessary to post commentary on EVERYTHING going on in pop culture and news. But that pressure is eased when you have more focus. And Jeff Goins says "The rule of thumb is this: The more narrow your focus, the more you broaden your audience."

Believe it or not, it's also easier to come up with ideas. I once feared establishing a niche because I thought it would be limiting, but I believe having a niche inspires you to be more creative as you think of all the ways you can explore your topic. Taking just a few minutes to brainstorm ideas based on my objective for this blog I came up with dozens of ideas. Here's a sample:

Business cards for bloggers and writers
How to cover events as an independent writer
The art of guest blogging
How I used my blog to help me fall in love with my hometown
How to make a media kit
What to wear to a blogging or writing conference
Signs you’re a real blogger
Signs you're a real writer
How to throw an event to promote your blog

Team Katniss Fashion

2012-03-06T06:56:00.003-06:00

As my closest friends (and my students) know, I'm a major Hunger Games geek. I've been counting down the days until the premiere of the upcoming movie inspired by Suzanne Collins' novel. (Only 17 more days to go!)

I'm a writer and nerd so, of course, I had to read all the books in The Hunger Games trilogy before the movie. If you haven't, I encourage you to do the same. Yes, it's Young Adult literature, but it's very well-written with a compelling plot and complex characters. And even if you're a blogger, journalist, or essayist, I truly believe that reading non-fiction can help your craft as the art of storytelling is so essential to all forms of writing.

I'm also a girl with a passion for fashion so, yes, I've been wondering, "What will I wear when I go see the movie." And here's my answer:

Get it here

The feminist in me could not resist. You see, The Hunger Games has a Twilight-esque love triangle and just as Twi-hards sport Team Edward and Team Jacob gear, there are plenty of t-shirts out there boasting Team Peeta or Team Gale. But Katniss is the hero of this story so let's celebrate her instead. Girl power!

But, just for fun, here are some other examples of Hunger Games-inspired fashion, all from Etsy.com in honor of National Crafts Month.

The Girl Who Was on Fire

Boy Shorts

Buy these here

Custom Painted Vans

Check these out here

I Heart Cinna

I think I'm gonna buy this one too

Hunger Games Inspired Peep-Toe Pumps!

Available here

And now the boys...

If you love the boy with the bread, click here

And if you like the bad boy type, check here

May the odds be ever in your favor...

Monday Motivation from Ray Bradbury

2012-03-05T08:00:00.000-06:00

image via

"You must write every single day of your life…You must lurk in libraries and climb the stacks like ladders to sniff books like perfumes and wear books like hats upon your crazy heads….may you be in love every day for the next 20,000 days. And out of that love, remake a world."

-- Ray Bradbury

Weekend Links: Sunday Reads

2012-03-04T07:00:00.001-06:00

Photo by David Hetre
Image via Creative Commons

Happy Sunday!

Hope you all are having a great weekend.

Here are a few stories you should check out as you're relaxing today:

Last Sunday was all about the Oscars and while Viola Davis didn't take home the Academy Award for Best Actress, according to The Daily Beast, she did win big in another way as she made a political statement with her lovely natural hair 'do.

And Essence reveals that Davis' choice to sport her natural hair instead of a wig was a very empowering moment for the thespian.

And while we're on the topic of minority issues, check out these two articles on how the black community is embracing Pinterest and the top 10 African Americans to follow on Pinterest. (No, unfortunately, I didn't make the list. But feel free to follow me at http://pinterest.com/writeousbabe.)

If you're visiting my blog because you're procrastinating on a piece you're supposed to be writing and feeling your passion for words is waning, please read Jeff Goins' wonderful post on how to fall back in love with writing.

March Intentions

2012-03-01T08:00:00.001-06:00

Photo by Alejandro Mallea
Image via Creative Commons

March is here and I’m so excited because Spring Break is just around the corner (one of the many perks of being a teacher). I’m also excited about my goals for the month. Here are my March Intentions:

Guest blog.

Write more articles for Clutch. For real.

Write and submit an essay to one of my favorite publications.

Post at least Blog Like a Girl Q&A.

Start a new workout regimen.

Go out on another girl date.

Spend Spring Break in Louisville and write about my trip.

Straighten my hair (not with chemicals and it will just be this way for two weeks).

What are your plans for March?

Editorial Calendars: Why You Need To Create One and How to Do It

2012-02-29T08:05:00.001-06:00

Photo by Joe Lanman
Image via Creative Commons

Last week when I interviewed L.K. Whitney about her new blog Magic City Made, she said one of the most valuable lessons she'd learned from her previous blogs was the importance of having an editorial calendar. I decided to not only pass on Whitney's wisdom to you all but to actually follow it too.

Since I started this blog back in August, I've really been struggling to find my way. I put so much of my creative energy into Georgia Mae that I'm often too exhausted to give this site the attention it deserves. But I realized that I could stay on top of things if I had a plan.

Developing an editorial calendar for this blog was harder than I thought. Even though I've been blogging for years, Georgia Mae began as a personal blog where I would really just write about whatever was on my mind or going on in my life and things going on in the news or in pop culture that inspired (or angered) me. But that's not why I created this new blog.

So that's step one to creating an editorial calendar: Be mindful of your mission. Remember why you started your blog and then develop categories that fulfill that purpose.

According to my Welcome page, "The purpose of this blog is three-fold: 1) to chronicle my attempt to make my writing dreams come true while working a full-time job (I’m a high school English teacher) and in the most unlikeliest of places (I live in the Deep South), 2) to explore my attempt to be fit and fabulous while I’m making those dreams come true, and 3) to share stories, advice, and ideas to help other authors, bloggers, and journalists make their writing dreams come true as well."

With that in mind I decided on the following editorial calendar:

Monday Motivation -- quotes from famous writers or personal stories that aim to offer encouragement to my fellow writers and bloggers
Tuesday and/or Thursday -- This will be my time to show off how I'm trying to be "fit and fabulous" on a writer's budget
Wednesday -- Writer Wisdom. These posts will offer practical advice for writers and bloggers, tips gathered from either my own experience or from other writers and bloggers
Friday or Saturday -- Weekend Links: Interesting articles I think you writer-types and blogging babes should read

I fully expect this calendar to change as I and the blog evolve, but I feel confident this will get me on the right track.

Why should you bother making an editorial calendar? The gals over at Independent Fashion Bloggers agree that using an editorial calendar is one of the best ways to increase blog traffic. It can keep you motivated. Now that I have my editorial calendar I know what kind of content I need to work to generate for this blog.

Editorial calendars are especially important for those of you who write niche blogs. Consider different elements or facets of your niche and use those to help you create your editorial calendar. You'll then know that each week you need to develop interesting content related to these specific topics.

Taylor Davies writes that having a "featured type of post is also a great way to hook readers, and keep them coming back to see your new twist on that feature each week." For example Eat, Sleep, Denim, a blog for which Davies writes, features every Wednesday a blogger with great denim style.

And for you current and aspiring fashion bloggers, here, from IFB, is the editorial calendar for Eat, Sleep, Denim to give you a bit more guidance:

Monday: Trend post
Tuesday: How to post
Wednesday: Blogger Style
Thursday: Street style
Friday: Denim Review

Now it's your turn. Join the fun and share your editorial calendar in the comments section.

February in Review

2012-02-29T08:00:00.010-06:00

Photo by Tatiana Gerus via Creative Commons

It's the last day of the month and time to reflect on my intentions for February. Let's see how I did:

1. Post a 31 before 32 list.

Done! Check it out here.

2. Have a great birthday weekend (I'm planning dinner and a movie with hubs and brunch with my girls.)

Did this too and had a fabulous time at Edgar’s Bakery. I forgot to take pictures, though. I must get better about that.

3. Run a half-marathon.

I did it and, much to my surprise, I survived! Here’s the post I wrote over at my blog GeorgiaMae.com about my race and my decision to start running despite my battles with a connective tissue disease.

4. Start a new workout regimen.

Fail! I knew after completing the marathon I wanted to cut down on the amount of running I do each week (for the sake of my joints) and develop a new routine. While I’ve gotten back into attending the dance-based aerobics class Body Jam every Wednesday, my plans to lift weights three times a week simply have not happened.

5. Start guest blogging.

I was honored to write a post for The Social Path on the social media hiatus I took in January.

6. Post three Blog Like a Girl Q&As.

Perhaps this was too ambitious. I managed to post one on the lovely L.K. Whitney of Magic City Made.

7. Plan the next See Jane Write event.

Still working on this.

8. Write more articles for Clutch, Guerrero Howe, and Weld.

Fail! Sort of. I did write for Guerrero Howe, but produced nothing for Clutch or Weld. Sigh.

9. Write and submit an essay to one of my favorite publications.

Fail. Hope to fix this next month.

10. Go out on a girl-date.

Some of you know I’m on a mission to find a new best friend, so I’ve been trying to get back into the girl-dating scene. I think I’ve found the one, but I don’t want to speak too soon, so more on this later.

I’ll be back tomorrow with my list of intentions for March.

How did the month of February treat you?

Monday Motivation from Sylvia Plath

2012-02-27T08:00:00.001-06:00

"And by the way, everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt." ~Sylvia Plath

Weekend Links

2012-02-25T12:15:00.000-06:00

Happy Saturday!

I hope your weekend is off to a great start. Here are a few links you should check out during your down time:

The tagline for this blog is: "I have some stories. I want to look good while I share them." And I mean that. But at least one fellow writer would have a problem with such a statement. Writing for Fishbowl DC, Betsy Rothstein says that female reporters look way too sexy these days, especially in their Twitter pics. The article is so funny to me I thought it was a joke, but apparently it's not.

Be sure to read this oh so clever response from Erin Gloria Ryan at Jezebel.

But speaking of writing and looking good, do you remember that Kanye West song Kanye's Workout Plan? I admit it's a guilty pleasure of mine. Well, inspired by this Kanye track, this week on Independent Fashion Bloggers Taylor Davies put together "The Blogger's Workout Plan". Not only is this post hilarious, but it's quite informative and contains plenty of tips that are helpful not only for fashion bloggers, but really any blogger who's looking to get their site in top shape.

In other social media news, my Sweet Home Alabama apparently really loves Pinterest. According to al.com people from Alabama are using the hot new social networking website at a rate more than two times higher than people in the United States as a whole.

Blog Like a Girl: Laura Kate Whitney of Magic City Made

2012-02-23T08:00:00.002-06:00

Blog Like a Girl is an occasional feature here at The Writeous Babe Project that highlights some of my favorite babes who blog. Today we chat with Laura Kate Whitney who became a blogging star here in Birmingham with her blog Magic City Manifesto. She started this blog when she first moved to the city. Her posts were all about her journey of getting to know and love her new home. Recently, Whitney launched a new blog, Magic City Made and she's here to tell us about this transition.

How did you decide it was time to end Magic City Manifesto and start Magic City Made?

Magic City Manifesto had a great run, but I’d been struggling for some time with the concept – it was started as a “newcomer’s adventure”, and I’m no longer a newcomer here in Birmingham. I’m not out exploring the streets and neighborhoods; rather, I’m engaged in community projects, I’m developing relationships, I’m used to my surroundings and I’m settling in to life here in the Magic City. Creating a new blog, and giving myself a fresh start, seemed like such a good idea. So far, so good.

What lessons did you learn from Magic City Manifesto and other blogs you've had in the past that you plan to help guide you with this latest project?

I think that each blog gets better. I really challenged myself with Magic City Made in that I wanted to dig deeper into Wordpress, I wanted to have a sharper/sleeker look. I’ve also learned, through experience, not to be so hard on myself, to spell check always, to map out some sort of editorial calendar, and to just be myself with it. Blogs are no fun if they begin to stress you out…

If you had to describe your new blog in 30 seconds, your elevator pitch if you will, what would you say? How would you say this project is different from Magic City Manifesto?

Magic City Made celebrates community and culture in Birmingham, Alabama. It’s a way of letting others know about the great things happening here in the Magic City, from local artisans and their wares to important initiatives that need support. My family of four is making their lives here in Birmingham. We are deeply connected to our city. I want others to see what we see. I want others to be aware that there is still plenty of magic to be had (and made)!!

How have you gone about promoting your new blog?

Twitter and Facebook, of course. And you know I’ve been talking…to everyone who will listen. I also look for complimentary sites and comment on those, linking back to my site. I try to stay part of the online dialogue. If I see an opportunity to shamelessly promote myself, I go for it.

What advice would you give to a blogger who has hit a plateau with her current blog and is thinking of starting a new one?

As I said earlier, if a blog is becoming stressful, re-evaluate. You may very well lose readers in the meantime, but you will certainly risk losing those readers if your content is forced/contrived/irrelevant. For me, blogging is a personal purge. It’s an itch I have to scratch.

Listen to your gut. People want authenticity. If you believe in what you’re saying/writing/blogging, the rest of the world will, too.

Making a Difference with Social Media

2012-02-21T15:39:00.001-06:00

When I took a 21-day break from social media in January I really missed all the fun I have on Twitter and Pinterest and the information and inspiration I gain from reading my favorite blogs. But now that social media and I have been back together for about a month now I’m beginning to wonder if this is really as far as our relationship will ever go.

I’m ready to move beyond just having a good time and I want to use social media to truly make a difference. But I’m not sure how.

Enter James Spann.

image via

As some of you who live in Birmingham may know, I am a member of the Alabama Social Media Association, better known as ALsocme. Yesterday, since school was closed in honor of President's Day, I was able to volunteer at a special talk we hosted featuring James Spann, who is arguably the best meteorologist in the Southeast (perhaps the world). So what does a meteorologist have to do with social media? Spann has nearly 50,000 Twitter followers and through Twitter and other social media platforms Spann saves lives as he warns us when to take cover in the threat of inclement weather.

I knew Spann’s talk would be interesting because the man can make meteorology exciting, but I didn’t know I would leave the event feeling so inspired. Frankly, I left feeling like I had been to church. By that I don't mean that Spann was preachy. No. Not all. What I mean is that I felt motivated and understood.

One of the things Spann mentioned was that there are still businesses out there that belittle social media. He said they think social media is just a place for gossiping teenage girls. I wanted to raise my hand and testify. Many of my co-workers and even some of my friends don't understand social media. They believe it's somehow beneath them and shake their heads at me for my passion for these platforms because they believe social media is simply a distraction from intellectual pursuits that are more worthy of my time.

But what these people don't realize is, just as Spann said in his talk, social media has the power to save lives. That's exactly what happened last year during the April 27 tornadoes when many people knew to get out of harm's way because of Spann's tweets. And furthermore it was through social media that many, if not most, recovery efforts were organized.

Spann is a prime example that social media matters and that with it you can make a difference. With social media you truly can make an impact in your sphere of influence.

Spann offered tips to business owners on how they can successfully use social media. For example, when a customer follows you on Twitter, follow them back. Otherwise, you're suggesting you want that person to listen to you but you don't care what he or she has to say, Spann said. And when a customer asks you a question via Twitter or Facebook, answer it ASAP. For businesses Spann also suggested staying away from divisive, polarizing topics such as politics or religion on your social media platforms. (And for Alabama-based business, he said, that also includes not stating whether you're an Alabama or Auburn fan. But I am not following that advice. Roll Tide Roll!)

But whether you’re a business owner or a writer or just someone who loves to tweet, Spann said that the key to making a difference with social media, or anything else really, is to have a servant's heart. When you start to put other people first that's when life gets good, Spann said.

These are all things many of us hear in church, but probably never thought once about applying to social media.

So often I'm guilty of thinking of Twitter as a platform to promote my blog and my blog as a way to promote my writing. But what if I began to look at all these things -- Twitter, Facebook, blogging, even Pinterest and Foursquare -- as a way to reach out and inspire others? So I left the meeting yesterday with the decision to do just that. I hope this post will inspire you to do the same.

Why I Run

2012-02-19T17:11:00.000-06:00

Last week this time I was lying on the sofa trying to recover from running 13.1 miles. Yes, that's right: I have checked off "Complete a half marathon" from my 31 before 32 list.

Here is a little essay titled Why I Run that I wrote about the experience for my blog GeorgiaMae.com. Enjoy!

xo,

javacia a.k.a. writeous babe

31 Before 32

2012-02-09T08:00:00.001-06:00

Happy birthday to me!

Today I turn 31 and for the past few years I have celebrated my birthday by making a list of things I want to accomplish that year. So here are the things I want to do before turning 32.

1. Have a birthday brunch with my girlfriends.

2. Complete a half marathon.

3. Become a blogging star.

4. Attend a blogging conference.

5. Write for xoJane.

6. Write for Hello Giggles.

7. Land my own column.

8. Write for The Frisky.

9. Write for Bust.

10. Have an essay published in Elle.

11. Get an essay published in Self.

12. Attend the Essence Music Festival.

13. Try Dance Trance.

14. Try PYT.

15. Host a panel discussion on freelancing.

16. Host a blog party.

17. Visit Chicago with my husband.

18. See my byline on Jezebel.

19. Write for B Metro.

20. Feel good in a bikini.

21. Climb a rock wall.

22. Find new BFFs.

23. Get new business cards.

24. Be in a belly dance hafla.

25. Go to fun halloween party.

26. Get a makeover.

27. Become a good photographer.

28. Fall in love with Birmingham.

29. Do 12 Dates of Christmas.

30. Send cute couple Christmas cards.

31. Pay off my credit card debt.

Check out my guest post on The Social Path

2012-02-02T08:00:00.003-06:00

My plan to do some guest blogging this month is already off to a great start! This week over at The Social Path I write about my social media hiatus. Learn more about what my time away from my favorite networks taught me about myself. (And be sure to leave comments on the post so the folks at The Social Path will be all like, "Wow, we need to get her to blog for us more often. She has fans!)

xo,
javacia

February Intentions

2012-02-01T07:02:00.001-06:00

February is here! It's my favorite month of the year, and not just because my birthday is on the 9th (although that has a lot to do with it). There's also Valentine's day and it's Black History Month. Here are a few of my goals for February:

1. Post a 31 before 32 list (coming up next week!)

2. Have a great birthday weekend (I'm planning dinner and a movie with hubs and brunch with my girls.)

3. Run a half-marathon.

4. Start a new workout regimen.

5. Start guest blogging.

6. Post three Blog Like a Girl Q&As.

7. Plan the next See Jane Write event.

8. Write more articles for Clutch, Guerrero Howe, and Weld.

9. Write and submit an essay to one of my favorite publications.

10. Go out on a girl-date.

What are your plans for February?

A Look Back at January

2012-01-31T15:54:00.000-06:00

It’s the last day of the month and time for me to reflect on my intentions for January. Let’s see how I did:

1. Give up meat for 21 Days of Prayer (a time of fasting and rededication at my church).

I did successfully give up meat for 21 days. Unfortunately it did not accomplish what I had hoped. I thought not eating meat would force me to eat more healthily. Instead I just ate lots and lots of cheese.

And as you know I decided to fast social media as well, which taught me a great deal about myself.

2. Grow closer to God during 21 Days of Prayer.

I did grow closer to God during 21 Days of Prayer, but I didn’t focus on prayer and bible study as much as I should have. I really regret that.

3. Try Pole Yourself Thin fitness class. (What? Church going gals can be sexy too!)

I didn’t make it to the class I planned to attend this month. I was too tired from my run that morning.

4. Continue training for my upcoming half marathon.

I have been training but unfortunately not as much as I should. I can’t really control this, however. I’m working on a huge project for my day job and I don’t get home until 7 p.m. or later.

5. Write more articles for Clutch and Guerrero Howe.

I didn’t write for Clutch as I had to give up reading that publication during my fast (since it’s technically a blog), but I did write for Guerrero Howe.

Swing by tomorrow for my February intentions.

Love Letter to Social Media

2012-01-29T15:23:00.001-06:00

image via

Dear Social Media,

I’ve missed you.

I know this trial separation was my idea, but I really missed you. And now that I’m returning I hope you’ll take me back with open arms. Sure, we were only apart for three weeks, but I learned a lot about you and about myself during those 21 days.

As silly as it will sound to people who don’t understand you, I realized that you make everything better. With Foursquare you turn an ordinary trip to the grocery store or pharmacy into an exciting adventure in which I tussle with residents to be crowned as mayor of my favorite local establishments. The hours I spend grading essays and reading quizzes don’t seem so bad when I can take occasional breaks to browse my favorite blogs. And when I get home from a long day at work and I’m too tired to read or write (or I’m tired of watching hours upon hours of wrestling with hubster) you are there with Pinterest letting me just relax and click through beautiful photographs. Then you inspire me to create digital vision boards of my own because you get that I’m a dreamer and you remind me I’m not the only one.

And yes I even will admit that sometimes I’m lost without. I’m not ashamed to say I get most of my news from you, at least indirectly. I know what’s going on in my city, my state, my country, and in my world because of the news articles you direct me to through blog posts, Twitter timelines and Facebook feeds. When storms came raging through my town before sunrise last Monday morning, I was so afraid without you to cling to. I’m so used to tracking tornadoes through my favorite meteorologist’s tweets. The thought never crossed my mind to just turn on the television. It’s crazy how much I depend on you.

And therein lies the problem. I missed you and I am looking forward to having you back in my life, but some things between us must change.

1) I need my friends. I realized over these past three weeks that I’ve allowed you to make me a bad friend. I’m always so busy trying to update my blogs and read all the interesting articles being posted on Facebook and Twitter that I don’t make time to have real conversations with my friends. During our break, I spent hours on the phone talking to my gal pals and I really enjoyed it. And so I hope you’ll understand that sometimes I need to step away from my computer and pick up the phone (and not just to text).

2) I need my fun. When I announced on all my social media networks that I’d be taking a sabbatical I thought my heart would break a bit with each “See You Later” post. But instead, I felt a great weight lift from my shoulders. You see, somewhere along the way our relationship stopped being fun. There was a time when blogging was one of the great joys of my life. Then I found myself wrapped up in SEO, page views, and editorial calendars. And even worse I developed a bad case of blog envy – you know, scrolling through my favorite blogs coveting their huge number of followers, comments, and revenue-generating sponsors. What we had used to be so easy and lately it’s seemed like a chore. This has to change. I know that like any relationship, ours will require work. But I want our romance to be a labor of love, not just labor.

3) I need my freedom. Next January, I think I will need another break. I hope that doesn’t hurt your feelings, but it’s just something I think I’ll need to do. Let’s not forget that I stepped away from you for a while because I was even sacrificing my spiritual life to spend more time with you. My pastor helped me realize that is idolatry and I must be free from that. So as we reunite I hope you understand that things will be different. I must use more of my free time to pray and study the Bible and to read things other than blogs. I love to read books (Hello? I’m an English teacher!) but I rarely have time to do so because I spend hours each day writing blog posts and checking Twitter for, well, ideas for more blog posts.

I know you’ll understand; you get me and that’s why I love you. But I just wanted to let you know where I stand.

Now let’s go take some new Facebook profile pictures and try to recover my Foursquare mayorships!

xo,

Why I'm Taking a Social Media Sabbatical

2012-01-08T20:23:00.001-06:00

image via

Today marked the beginning of my church’s annual 21 Days of Prayer – a time of intensive prayer and fasting. While the word fasting may to some of you only mean giving up food, our pastor also encourages us to abstain from anything that may be a hindrance to our relationship with God or others.

This morning I went to church with my mind made up to give up meat for the next three weeks in hopes that this would force me to make healthier choices in my diet. A month or so ago I had considered also giving up social media – including Twitter, Facebook, Foursquare, Pinterest, and even blogging. But I later decided against it, mainly for the sake of GeorgiaMae.com and my goal of growing this blog.

Then Pastor Chris began his sermon for today and started talking about idolatry, which simply means putting other things before God. “Have you made social media an idol?” Pastor Chris asked. “Of course not,” I thought to myself. Suddenly I felt something inside say, “Really?”

Uh oh. Then I remembered all those nights when I was up late reading through my Twitter feed and browsing my favorite blogs for post ideas when I should have been using that time to pray or study the Bible or I should have gone to sleep so I could wake up early the next day and have a longer morning devotion. These thoughts would even go through my mind as I surfed the web, but I would rationalize my choices saying I was too tired to do something like read the Bible because that would take so much concentration; on the other hand clicking through a few links wouldn’t require much brainpower.

But the bottom line is even though I’m not one of those people who update their Facebook statuses constantly and tweet every five minutes, I was putting social media before God. And I have been for quite some time.

So for the next three weeks I’m taking a social media sabbatical. Don’t worry; Edd will hold down the fort at GeorgiaMae.com and I am confident I will return with lots of energy and ideas that I will pour into this blog. If you need me, you can always reach me via e-mail. And if the Lord’s willing and the creek don’t rise, as the old folks say, I’ll be back Sunday, Jan. 29.

xo,

January Intentions

2012-01-03T07:00:00.002-06:00

Happy New Year!

I hope 2012 is off to a great start for everyone.

Each December I spend most of my free time drafting a ridiculously long list of goals -- both big and small -- for the upcoming year. Last month was no different and, in fact, my list for 2012 is my longest yet, coming in at over 150 goals.

Inspired by Kaileen Elise, I've decided that this year in order to make all these goals a bit more manageable I'm going to post a few intentions for the month. These intentions will help me focus on certain things for the month and will be related to my personal mission for 2012, which is to be physically, emotionally, financially, and spiritually well.

So here are my January intentions:

1. Give up meat for 21 Days of Prayer (a time of fasting and rededication at my church).
2. Grow closer to God during 21 Days of Prayer.
3. Try Pole Yourself Thin fitness class. (What? Church going gals can be sexy too!)
4. Continue training for my upcoming half marathon.
5. Write more articles for Clutch and Guerrero Howe.

What do you intend to do this month?

This Blogger's New Year's Resolution

2011-12-31T07:39:00.000-06:00

Following the advice of social media guru Wade Kwon, this is my New Year's resolution:

In 2012 I resolve to live the life I want to blog about!

I hope you'll join the fun by following my life adventures here and posting your own.

Reverb11: One year from now...

2011-12-31T07:35:00.000-06:00

Reverb11 Prompt #31: Where do you hope to be on Jan 1, 2013?

On Jan. 1, 2013 I hope to be doing the same thing I plan to be doing on the morning of Jan. 1, 2012 -- having brunch. New Year's Day brunch has been a tradition of mine for several years and one I hope to continue for many more.

But at brunch on New Year's Day 2013, things will be different; I will be different. My mantra for for this new year is Getting Well in 2012. Yes, I know it's a bit lame that it rhymes, but that doesn't take detract from its purposefulness. My goal for 2012 is to get healthy in every way.

I want to be physically healthy and I plan to do that by adopting a regular exercise regimen, taking my medication as my doctor tells me to, and making better food choices. In fact, my hope is that by the end of 2012 this junk food junkie will be a bonafide foodie.

I want to be financially healthy. So I'm going to freelance like crazy and use the extra money to pay off credit card debt.

I want to be mentally and emotionally healthy. I'm going to stop being in denial about my depression and do something about it.

I want to be spiritually healthy. There was a point in my life, just before I moved back to Birmingham, when I was so close to God it was as if I could feel God holding my hand as I walked down a sidewalk. I remember one day He seemed so close it felt like I was sitting in His lap while I had lunch with a friend. Seriously. In 2012, I'm determined to get that feeling back.

So on Jan. 1, 2013, I plan to be at brunch as always, but I hope to be the happiest and healthiest Javacia you have ever known.

Thanks for reverbing with me this month. Let's make 2012 our best year yet!

Reverb11: Note to Self

2011-12-31T07:20:00.000-06:00

Reverb11 Prompt #30: Write a letter to your future self.

Hey you,

Guess what? You did it!

Love,

Reverb11: 12 for 2012

2011-12-29T18:51:00.002-06:00

Prompt #26: What are 12 things your life doesn't need in 2012?
Prompt #27: What are 12 things you want to add to your life in 2012?

12 Things I Plan to Rid My Life of in 2012
1. Negative self talk. Every year I promise to stop calling myself fat. In 2012 I'm going to actually do it. (I hope.)
2. Credit card debt.
3. Depression.
4. Clutter! I am such a pack rat.
5. Self-doubt
6. My addiction to sugar
7. Guilt over saying "no"
8. Grudges
9. My tendency to be overly concerned with what others think of me
10. My tendency to compare myself to others (I must accept I'll never look like Beyonce.)
11. My tendency to over commit
12. My stupid Blackberry. (This year I swear I'm going to be a big girl and finally get an iPhone.)

12 Things I Want to Add to My Life in 2012
1. A new BFF
2. More free time (not yet sure how I'm going to pull this one off)
3. More freelancing opportunities.
4. Healthy eating habits.
5. Things to make my apartment welcoming, cozy, and beautiful.
6. More quality time with hubs.
7. I want to spend more time with family.
8. I want to make time to actually talk to friends on the phone instead of via text, email, or social media.
9. A new wardrobe!
10. A deeper relationship with God.
11. More blog followers (here and at GeorgiaMae.com)
12. More social media knowledge

Reverb11: Run, Girl!

2011-12-29T18:09:00.000-06:00

Reverb Prompt #28: What new strengths did you discover about yourself this year?

One of the greatest strengths I discovered about myself this year was realizing that my body, despite its connective tissue disease and other chronic pain disorders, is strong enough to run. Here are a few things things that keep me going when I'm tempted to throw in the towel on my new sport:

Reverb11: What About Your Friends?

2011-12-28T12:01:00.002-06:00

My Reverb11 Prompt #20 asks: How did you build community this year?

That's easy. I started a group for local female writers called See Jane Write.

Here I am with a few lovely ladies who spoke on the See Jane Write "So You Think You Can Blog" panel.

I helped a local lady by the name of Katrina Watson build a social group for women of color with natural hair called Birmingham Natural Beauties.

Birmingham Natural Beauties Leadership Team

I joined Black Girls Run Birmingham, the local chapter of a natural organization that seeks to encourage women of color to run and stay fit.

A few ladies of Black Girls Run Birmingham after a run this fall.

And I led a women's small group for my church.

Here I am with a few ladies from my small group at this year's ReCreate Women's Conference

Through all these efforts to build community many new friendships blossomed (which prompt #21 asks). These groups added beauty to my life (prompt #24) and I pray that through them I added beauty to the lives of others (prompt #25).

Yet despite all these efforts I must confess that as 2011 draws to a close I find myself feeling very lonely. Lately, I've even been asking God for new friends, a prayer that makes me feel like the lamest girl in the world.

I hope this request doesn't make me sound ungrateful. I have plenty of wonderful women in my life I consider to be fantastic friends, such as the women I've met through the aforementioned groups. But many of my closest friends don't live in Birmingham and I’m also finding that many of my friends – those local and elsewhere – and I don’t have much in common anymore. We may have one thing that links us – such as our job or our church – but we don’t truly have similar passions or even listen to the same music. I don’t even have any local friends to talk to about Grey’s Anatomy!

Prompt #22 asks: Who do you miss? That's an easy one too. I really miss my gal pal Maisy. We worked together when I was full-time journalist in Louisville. We became instant BFFs not simply because we worked together (in an office the size of my bedroom) but also because we had so much in common -- our love for writing, pop culture, fashion, Mexican food, and even Hello Kitty, just to name a few. Our husbands had a lot in common too which was another plus. These days I'm in Birmingham and she's in Boston. She's also a mom now and I'm essentially juggling two careers along with all my community involvement so we don't get to talk much. Oh, how I miss her.

Making friends as an adult is so hard. As kids you could just walk up to someone on the playground ask them if they’d be your best friend and you were set. If you did that now you’d probably be reported to human resources.

Furthermore, I’m at a strange stage in my life that causes making friends to be even tougher: I’m married, but childless, and, right now, plan to stay that way. So I don’t fit in with most single women because I’m completely over the party scene, but I don’t fit in with most married women either because I don’t have children. I have the liberty to go out to dinner, to the movies, to my favorite winery for a drink or to my favorite trail for a run whenever I want and I don’t have to find a babysitter first. So my lifestyle simply doesn’t mesh well with that of a young mother.

In 2012 I'm hoping to attract new girlfriends who share several of my interests (prompt #23). Because I’m a journalist I'm naturally curious about most things. So I can sit and listen to someone talk about their kids or their garden for hours even though I’m not a parent and don’t have a yard. But selfishly I want a friend who will listen to me talk about running and blogging and who will get my references to The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl. And if it's not too much to ask, I'd love for her to live in Birmingham so we can have these chats over mango margaritas, not via Skype.

In closing, here's a fitting video from the greatest girl group of all time (in my humble opinion).

10 Things I Love About Winter

2011-12-21T12:14:00.000-06:00

I'm heading out of town in an hour or so and will be without Internet access for the next week. (I died a little inside just typing that). So Reverb11 will return when I'm back to civilization.

In the meantime, I give you a slightly modified version of a fun little post I wrote last year for Georgia Mae.

***

It should be no surprise that I hate cold weather. I was born and raised in Alabama and I lived in California during my early 20s. So I begin to dread winter pretty much as early as the first day of autumn. But in an effort to not be such a grump, this winter solstice I give to you 10 things I love about winter:

10. Conversation Hearts

Forget a box of chocolates, give me a pack of Necco Sweethearts for Valentine's Day and I will be your #1 FAN.

9. Hot chocolate

Why do the coffee house baristas ask if you want whipped cream? Of course I do! And I better not find out you have marshmallows back there that you're saving for your favorite customers.

8. Snow Days

Now that I'm a teacher instead of a full-time journalist snow means I get a phone call telling me not to come to work instead of one telling me to come in early (and stay late). Furthermore, living in the Deep South instead of the Mid West means that even when it does snow I still have no use for our snow shovel. So no more of this:

7. The Snuggie!

Whether you sport the original Tibetan monk red, the breast cancer awareness pink, or a University of Alabama themed Snuggie like yours truly, do so with pride. Don't worry about haters like my husband. And get one for your dog too!

6. Cowgirl boots

Sure, some girls sport these even in summer with their favorite mini skirts but I think that's a bit weird and this girl lives in flip flops from March to October. So winter is the only time the boots get to make an appearance.

5. Layers

Really I don't need winter to dress in layers. I usually wear a camisole with everything but cold weather does mean even more layers. You'll usually find me sporting a cami under a quirky tee under a cardigan. And according to Family Guy, this makes me cool.

4. Scarves

The scarf is quite possibly life's greatest fashion accessory. Not only is it functional, keeping you warm on those chilly days, but it adds flair to any simple outfit. I'm currently on a mission to collect scarves in every hue imaginable. Feel free to contribute to the cause.

3. Winter break

As a teacher I not only get snow days but also two weeks off every December. I guess they give us perks like this to make up for the low salary.

2. My birthday

I love celebrating birthdays, especially my own! I hope you'll join me for whatever party I concoct this February. (And bring gifts...low salary, remember)

1. New Year's Eve

Winter may mean no flip flops but it also means my favorite holiday of the year - New Year's Eve, a night that for me is not about the parties, but the possibilities. It's about all the hopes for the year to come and the magical feeling I have on this night that I can make all my dreams come true.

Happy Winter Solstice!

Reverb11: My Favorite Things

2011-12-19T06:00:00.002-06:00

I decided to tackle prompts 15-19 together. Here they are:

15. Which blogs did you enjoy most this year?
16. Oprah asks you to write an article on your favorite things of 2011. What are they?
17. What were your favorite songs of the year?
18. What books did you read?
19. What movies did you see?

And so here are a few of my favorite blogs, songs, books, and movies from 2011.

Blogs I Love

Danielle Hampton of Sometimes Sweet
image via Hello Giggles

Hampton's site Sometimes Sweet is a fantastic lifestyles blog that reminds me to cherish every moment of every day.

Elsie Larson of A Beautiful Mess

Larson's blog A Beautiful Mess inspires me to fill my world with beauty and she recently wrote something that completely describes my own approach to life: "The older I get the more I feel like I live for goals." You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one.

Nik G. of Nik Star Was Here

I always feel like I'm hanging out with an old girlfriend when I'm reading Nik G.'s blog Nik Star Was Here, which features fashion, food, fitness and more. Check out my Q&A with her.

Sarah McColl of Pink of Perfection
image via The Haystack Needle

I can always count on Sarah McColl's Pink of Perfection for inspiration or a quick pick-me-up.

My theme song of the year!

Books I couldn't put down...

The nerdy girls always read the book before we see the movie. And speaking of movies...

My Favorite Films of 2011

What were your favorite blogs, songs, books, and movies of 2011?

Charlize Theron thinks I'm "messed up"

2011-12-16T14:14:00.001-06:00

If you've known me even for a short time and even if it's only through my other blog, GeorgiaMae.com, you probably know that I love Hello Kitty despite the fact that I'm 30 years old.

Apparently Charlize Theron would say I have issues.

US Weekly reports that during The New York Times' Times Talk panel the 36-year-old actress said she does not understand why so many women in their 30s wear Hello Kitty gear or why people seem to be OK with this.

"I'm pretty amazed by Hello Kitty. I see so many women in their 30s walking around in Hello Kitty sh*t and nobody is concerned for them," Theron said. "It's the one iconic teenage symbol that seems okay for women in their 30s? The world seems to not have an issue with it."

She went on to say most women are "messed up."

Funny enough, the one rule I made for myself regarding my Hello Kitty mania when I hit the big 3-0 was that I would no longer wear Hello Kitty clothing (not counting my beloved Hello Kitty bathrobe). I'd keep the Hello Kitty key chains, notebooks, and rear windshield sticker, but no more T-shirts featuring the Sanrio superstar. (Although, I don't scoff at 30-something women who do still rock HK tees.) So perhaps Theron would say I'm just a bit messed up.

I also won't decorate my apartment with Hello Kitty paraphernalia, but that's probably just because I'm married. If I were single my kitchen would certainly have this:

But I feel that as long as I'm taking care of adult responsibilities like going to work, paying my bills on time, and cleaning my apartment and I'm emotionally mature enough to be a great wife and a trustworthy friend, I should be allowed to be a kid at heart. So I will do just that even if Charlize Theron thinks I'm stupid.

P.S. -- Dear friends, I need a new wallet. Hint. Hint.

What do you think about women in their 30s sporting Hello Kitty gear?

Reverb11: Quitting Time

2011-12-15T21:35:00.001-06:00

Sorry, I've been a bit behind with my Reverb posts, but allow me to try to catch up.

Prompt 14 reads "Write about a time this year when you persevered." This was a hard prompt to consider because honestly, I feel I'm still in the midst of trying to persevere. I've been struggling with a lot emotionally, spiritually, and physically this year and I've frequently wanted to throw in the towel on my dreams, my community activities, my writing, and even my social life. But I'm doing my best to keep things moving along.

image via

On the other hand, prompt 13 asked, "Write about a time this year when you gave up." This one is pretty easy. Last month I foolishly decided to sign up for National Novel Writing Month. I actually thought I could find time to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days. Let's remember that I work full-time as a high school English teacher (which means I spend most evenings grading papers), I maintain two blogs, I freelance for several publications, I'm training for a half marathon, I was taking an online college course and I was leading a small group for my church. And somehow I thought I would be able to write a novel too. As my husband would say, "Playa please!" It was a horrible idea and I gave up one week in. I don't regret quitting that project. I was insane to even attempt it. Maybe I'll try again next year. Maybe not.

Dance Dance Revolution

2011-12-15T19:32:00.000-06:00

Who has two thumbs and the cover story for this week's issue of Weld for Birmingham? *Points thumbs at self* This girl! Click here to check it out.

Currently

2011-12-14T06:30:00.001-06:00

Danielle over at Sometimes Sweet shared this fun post late last month and other bloggers have been playing along too. Lately, I’ve been having a hard time blogging so I decided to join the fun in hopes of getting back my blogging mojo. Enjoy!

Obsessing over: Running. But most of you already knew that. I’m training for a half marathon, which I’ll run in February. So each day I plan around the question, “When can I squeeze in time to run?” Sunday my running group, Black Girls RUN Birmingham, had a meet and greet with the goal of helping us local black female runners get to know one another better and introducing aspiring runners to the group. We had a great time, great food, and great music – including Beyonce’s “Run the World” which I thought was definitely in order.

Photo by Kimberly Bishop

Working on: Finishing up the semester. Today I give two more exams, tomorrow I’ll spend the day cleaning my classroom and preparing for next semester, and Friday after a faculty luncheon I’ll be on winter break. Yes, I am counting down the days!

Thinking about: Goals. It’s December, which means it’s the month I spend a lot of time thinking about and jotting down my aspirations for the upcoming year. Along with running a half marathon, I have hopes of traveling more next year, becoming a foodie, freelancing more, and just living the life I want to blog about.

Anticipating: New Year’s Eve. It’s my favorite holiday because I’m such a dreamer and on this night I have a heart full of hope and I’m utterly convinced I can and will make all my dreams come true. As of now, I don’t have any plans, so if you’re in Birmingham and you know of some good parties going down on Dec. 31, please let me know. This year I want to get dressed up and dance until my feet hurt.

Listening to: Robin Thicke’s Love After War. It’s his best album since his spectacular debut release, A Beautiful World.

Drinking: Water. Wish I had a more interesting answer like Cupcake Chardonnay, but when I was typing this I'd just run several miles so a girl was thirsty for some H2O.

Wishing: I could be one of those people who get sickeningly excited about Christmas. I wish I loved decorating and baking, sending Christmas cards and singing holiday tunes. Instead I get a serious case of holiday blues this time of year and all the aforementioned things make me want to gag. Now that I’m an adult (supposedly) I do like that Edd and I have been collecting Christmas ornaments over the years. It's one of those things that makes me feel like we're a real family. So perhaps that’s a start. Here’s one of my favorite ornaments:

(You can't see it in this photo, but she's holding a mug of hot cocoa with marshmallows. I love it!)

How about you? What are you up to today?

On the 12th Day of Reverb...

2011-12-12T06:30:00.001-06:00

So on Day 7 of Reverb11 I decided to torture myself by reflecting on all the goals I failed to accomplish in hopes that I would figure out what I did wrong so I could bring those dreams to fruition in 2012. Instead I just got depressed and didn't post for the next few days.

No, I'm just kidding (sort of). I didn't post for a few days simply because I was busy writing a 31-page exam, grading 70 article summaries and 16 oral presentations, trying to complete an online college course, and trying to squeeze in regular runs and holiday parties. Whew!

So today I'm going to pick things up again.

Prompt 8: Looking back on this year, what would you do differently?

To be honest, I would listen to my husband more. As I've expressed in responses to other prompts, this year has been very overwhelming for me in part because of health issues but mostly because I got involved in far too many things. Edd warned me that this would happen. But I was stubborn, said yes to everything and ended up drowning in tasks.

Fortunately, he's sweet enough to never say I told you so.

Prompt 9: How did you have fun this year?

Even though being involved in so many community activities has been the source of so much of my stress this year it's also been the source of so much fun. From mixers with other local natural hair beauties to meetings with my running group to creating a networking group for local women writers, these organizations have helped me fall in love with my city.

Here I am with the lovely ladies of Birmingham Natural Beauties

Here I am with a few of the amazing women of Black Girls Run Birmingham.
We were volunteering at the Ruben Studdard Half-Marathon and everyone said we had the best water station.
Go BGR!

Prompt 10: Where did you visit?

I spent several days in Louisville, the hometown of my heart, and we took our usual trips to Virginia to visit the in-laws. Here I am at Virginia Beach:

I also spent a lot of time in Atlanta this year attending conferences.

Prompt 11: How did you celebrate and take care of your body this year?

I made a decision to stop worrying about how much my body weighs and start focusing on what it can do. And right now I'm determined to prove that this body can run a half marathon!

Prompt 12: What or whom did you let go of this year? Why?

I'm not sure why I chose this prompt because honestly I don't think I've let go of anything this year, but I mean that in a good way. As challenging as this year has been, I've actually found so many of my deferred dreams revived. I don't know if I've hit rock bottom and, therefore, figure things can't go anywhere but up, but oddly enough, even though I feel really down most days I am still hopeful that things will get better, that a change will come, and that one day all my dreams will come true.

Reverb11: If at first you don't succeed...

2011-12-07T18:55:00.000-06:00

Reverb 11 Day 7 -- Today's Prompt: What goals for the year did you fail to meet?

I suppose it's not healthy to dwell on your failures, but perhaps taking a look at a few of them will help me figure out what I need to do differently next year.

I failed to stop using credit cards. This is partially Uncle Sam's fault. We owed a lot at tax time and had to charge it. But later I decided to also use that credit card to buy hubs an insanely expensive suit and register for a writing conference. Guess I can't blame Uncle Sam for that.

I failed to keep off the weight I lost at the beginning of the year. I'm eating Tropical Chewy Lemonheads & Friends as I type this so I guess we all know how that happened.

Sadly, I didn't do many of the fun things I planned to do with hubs this year such as have a picnic at Railroad Park or go to our city's popular Crawfish Boil.

And my attempt to write a novel in 30 days through the National Novel Writing Month was an epic fail: I quit about one week in.

Well, now that I'm thoroughly depressed, I'm going to go eat some more lemonheads.

I'll be back tomorrow to discuss what I think I should have done differently. Maybe.

Reverb11: Get Her Done

2011-12-06T21:24:00.000-06:00

Reverb11 Day 6 -- Today's prompt: What goals for 2011 did you accomplish?

Sorry I'm so late posting this. It's been a long day.

I accomplished quite a bit this year. I think turning 30 lit a fire under me.

Here are a few of the goals from my list of 2011 aspirations that I've been able to check off:

Dance in a flash mob
Go to Fro Fashion Week
Write for Hairpin
Write for Clutch
Get published in Skirt
Lead a small group for my church

What did you accomplish this year?

I've Got a (Girl) Crush on You

2011-12-06T07:00:00.001-06:00

Demetria L. Lucas posted a great story at Vibe Vixen yesterday on the beauty of girl crushes.

First of all, she explained that a girl crush is not about the girl-on-girl action that fills the sexual fantasies of way too many men. A girl crush is strictly platonic and is about being infatuated with a woman who possesses traits you admire such as "beauty, sophistication, sass, confidence, etc."

Lucas believes that every girl needs a girl crush and I completely agree. Lucas writes:

Having a girl crush also tells something else about you. There’s a certain type of woman who can see a fabulous fly woman and lift her up, instead of tear her down. If you’ve got a crush, you’re the type that bypasses buying into the negativity that is often associated with women’s social interactions (thanks Wives’ franchises). Girls who crush on girls offer a positive expression for how we ladies, really–no, seriously–actually do get along.

I have so many girl crushes I can't keep count, but I thought it might be fun to highlight a few.

Beyonce

I am a complete Beyonce stan. I think she's one of the most beautiful women on the planet, I love her music (in fact I'm rocking to her girl power anthem "Run the World" as I type this) and yes, I think she's a great role model for young girls. No, she's not perfect, but I admire her dedication to her work and how she always presents herself with such class and grace. And I love that she and Jay-Z did things the old-fashioned way: courtship, marriage, and then a child.

Michelle Obama

I love my first lady, y'all. How can you not have a crush on a first lady who knows how to Dougie, has great fashion sense, and has beautifully sculpted arms? And her campaign against childhood obesity is to be applauded.

Zoe Saldana

image via

I've always enjoyed Zoe Saldana's movies and, yes, she is insanely beautiful, but I went gaga for her last year when I read her interview with Glamour magazine and found this quote from her:

"I love women. I worship women. Don’t want to be any other woman but myself."

The feminist in me couldn't help but fall for that.

Scarlett Johansson

I'll be honest; Scarlet is on this list for a completely superficial reason: she's sexy as hell. Yes, she's a great actress and I respect her for that, but the quality she has that I want is pure sex appeal. She exudes it and looks hot even when she's not in some ridiculous sex pot pose. See:

Sex appeal is something I feel as if I've ever possessed. I've been the smart girl, the cute girl, the fun and down-to-earth girl, but never the sexy lady.

I know I'll probably lose my feminist card revoked for being concerned about such things. I know I shouldn't care about this, but I do. I want to feel sexy, dammit! So sue me.

Sloane Crosley

One of my biggest dreams in life is to publish a collection of essays. If I had the ability to write anything half as clever as Crosley's writings I'd probably have a book deal by now. Crosley is an amazingly skillful writer and is effortlessly funny. She must have that Tina Fey gene that makes it so that every thought you have is wonderfully witty even when you're not trying. If you don't know her books consider I Was Told There'd Be Cake and How'd You Get This Number your December reading assignments. Yes, there will be a quiz.

Soledad O'Brien

I've never had aspirations of being in broadcast journalism, but Soledad O'Brien's compelling work -- such as the Black in America series -- motivates me to write things that matter, things that will really make a difference.

Elsie Larson

Elsie Larson isn't a famous actress or singer but still seems like a celebrity to me. She's a well-known blogger and I visit her site A Beautiful Mess every single day. It's odd that I love her blog so much. Many of her posts are on creating handmade fashion accessories, home decor, etc. -- a talent I don't possess AT ALL. But I live the life of a crafty lady vicariously through her blog. Larson is a vintage boutique owner and I enjoy her fashion posts too. Larson also makes lists of goals to celebrate her birthday just as I do. You see, we were meant to be friends.

Who's your girl crush?

Crossposted on Georgia Mae.

Reverb11: Obsession

2011-12-05T18:11:00.001-06:00

Day 5 of Reverb11 - Today's Prompt: What lessons did you learn this year?

The main thing I learned about myself this year is that I am at my best when I'm obsessed. Let me explain.

I have learned that when I decide to do something and I focus on that goal to the point of borderline obsession that goal is always accomplished. Always. At the beginning of the year I was obsessed with losing weight healthily through increased exercise and a balanced diet. I dropped 15 pounds. (Unfortunately, I have since picked them back up.)

Then I became was obsessed with starting a networking group for women writers in Birmingham. At my first event I had 14 ladies show up for dinner at a local Mexican restaurant. Four months later I had an event that drew all most 70 women.

In the summer and fall I was obsessed with getting more freelance writing gigs. I've found myself with so many opportunities I'm struggling to juggle them with my full time job.

The problem with being so driven by desire, however, is that I can't be highly successful at several things at once operating this way. Case in point: I started to gain my weight back as soon as my focus shifted to the writing group.

I still have yet to learn how to balance my passions. Perhaps that wisdom will come to me in 2012.

What did you learn about yourself this year?

Reverb11: Running on Empty

2011-12-04T18:58:00.000-06:00

Reverb11 Day 4 - Today's Prompt: When did you struggle?

As I mentioned yesterday I've been having a rough time since early August. To avoid throwing a virtual pity party for myself, I'll give you the Cliff's Notes (or Spark Notes for you youngsters).

Since August I've found myself very unhappy professionally (cry every morning before work unhappy) and I've made the mistake of committing myself to far too many community activities. I'm involved in so much I barely have time to sleep.

I'm constantly sick and an illness I was diagnosed with about four years ago has started to get worse. Now this disease is not only affecting my connective tissues and causing severe fatigue and joint and muscle pain, but it is possibly now taking its toll on my nervous system making me prone to depression and making it nearly impossible for me to deal with stress.

I've been a mess, but I haven't lost hope. In fact just today, perhaps just in time for this post, while at a church-related women's retreat I got some direction on what needs to be done to pull myself out of this funk.

I realized I've been running on empty. I've been so busy I haven't taken time to do things that truly nurture my soul -- which for me is spending time studying Scripture and writing in my prayer journal.

A wise woman who spoke at today's retreat also talked about the importance of "condensing your calling." Instead of saying yes to every little thing that sounds a little bit interesting, I need to focus on activities that are related to my true purpose. And the only way to figure out that true purpose, the only way to know my calling is to get back to those quiet times of devotion, those moments of study and prayer.

Reverb11: Grateful for My Guy

2011-12-03T17:02:00.001-06:00

Day 3 of Reverb11. Today's prompt: When were you most grateful?

Since the first week of August I have been having an extremely rough time (more on this tomorrow) yet ironically it has been during this time that I've found myself extremely grateful. Why? Because of this guy:

Hubs and I one New Year's Eve (and lots of drunk people in the back)

That's my hubs. We've been married for about five and a half years and frankly I can't believe he's put up with me for that long.

Through this difficult time I've questioned nearly everything: my purpose, my dreams, my strength, my sanity, and even the genuineness of most of my friendships. But I never have to question my husband's love for me. And through all of this he's been there with a shoulder for me to cry on and ear to listen to all my troubles. And he's been there encouraging me to dust myself off and get back in the game.

Reverb11: Three Words

2011-12-02T06:30:00.015-06:00

image via

Welcome back for Day 2 of Reverb11.

Today's prompt: What three words capture 2011? What three words describe how you feel about 2012?

My words for 2011 are: community, challenge, and overwhelmed.

Community: Near the beginning of the year I made a promise to myself to be truly committed to building community. So I started a group for local women writers, joined a social group for local women with natural hair, signed up to be a small group leader at my church and joined a running group. (More on these to come on Day 20.). Yep, I think that makes me pretty committed to community.

Challenge: Speaking of that running group, this year I challenged myself to try things I'd never done before and one of the greatest examples would be taking up the new hobby of running. I have a connective tissue disease that makes high impact exercise extremely difficult. In fact, some doctors believe people with my disease shouldn't run at all. But I've spent this year running away from can't.

Overwhelmed. This is both a good and bad thing. I'm overwhelmed by all that I've accomplished this year and by all the wonderful people I've met, but lately I've also been feeling overwhelmed by all the things staring at me on my to-do list. I was a bit too ambitious this year and made the mistake of over committing myself and now, frankly, I'm paying for it.

My words for 2012 are: determination, wellness, and fun

Determination: Though I accomplished much this year, there are still many goals I failed to meet. In 2012 I will take a fresh approach to these aspirations and I am determined to see these dreams come to fruition.

Wellness. My mantra for the New Year is "Getting Well in 2012." I must start taking better care of myself not only through regular exercise, but by eating better and cutting back on some activities so that I can rest more.

Fun. During these stressful times I've been facing lately I've learned that no matter how much you have on your plate, things go down easy when you try to have a good time with your tasks. So next year my focus will be simply to have fun no matter what I'm doing.

Your turn!

Reverb11: Where did 2011 begin?

2011-12-01T10:34:00.001-06:00

Where did 2011 begin?

2011 began just as many of my years have: with brunch! I contend brunch is the greatest meal of them all and on January 1 I celebrated the New Year by having brunch with hubs. Then I headed home to journal about all my goals for the next 12 months.

I begin each year with a heart full of hope, which is why I always tell people New Year's Eve is my favorite holiday. There's something about the approaching of a New Year that makes me feel so determined and courageous. No matter how lofty my aspirations may be, at the beginning of the year I am sure I can and will accomplish them all.

How did your year begin?

Let's Reverb!

2011-11-30T19:43:00.006-06:00

photo by Matt Ryall

All month long I was looking forward to receiving my first Reverb11 prompt in my e-mail inbox on Dec. 1. Then last night I learned that wasn't going to happen. Gwen Bell, one of the Reverb creators, sent a message to all of us reverbers saying she wouldn't be hosting #Reverb11 this year. The party was over. And I was heartbroken, but only for a few seconds.

In her email Gwen Bell encouraged us to start Reverb11 projects of our own and so I decided to do just that.

For those of you wondering what the heck is a Reverb, let me explain. It started last year as Reverb10. We participating bloggers received a prompt each day in December that encouraged us to reflect on the past year and manifest great things for the year to come.

So I spent some time today coming up with 31 prompts. If you're a blogger I hope you will join me, answer these questions for yourself (one each day or perhaps just a few over the course of the month if you prefer) and post your reflections on your blog and then copy a link to your post in the comments section of my posts so I can read what you have to say. And be sure to tweet your posts too using the hashtag #reverb11.

Happy reverbing!

1. Where did 2011 begin?
2. What three words capture 2011? What three words describe how you feel about 2012?
3. When were you most grateful?
4. When did you struggle?
5. What lessons did you learn this year?
6. What goals for 2011 did you accomplish?
7. What goals for the year did you fail to meet?
8. Looking back on this year, what would you do differently?
9. How did you have fun this year?
10. Where did you visit?
11. How did you celebrate and take care of your body this year?
12. What or whom did you let go of this year? Why?
13. Write about a time this year when you gave up.
14. Write about a time this year when you persevered.
15. Which blogs did you enjoy most this year?
16. Oprah asks you to write an article on your favorite things of 2011. What are they?
17. What were your favorite songs of the year?
18. What books did you read?
19. What movies did you see?
20. How did you build community this year?

21. What new friendships blossomed in your life this year?

22. Who did you miss?

23. Who do you want to attract into your life in 2012?

24. What things added beauty to your life this year?
25. How did you add beauty to the lives of others?
26. What are 12 things your life doesn't need in 2012? How will you eliminate them?
27. What are 12 things you want to add to your life in 2012?

28. What new strengths did you discover about yourself this year?

29. How did your spirituality transform this year?

30. Write a letter to your future self.

31. Where do you hope to be on Jan 1, 2013?

Color Me Thankful

2011-11-24T07:51:00.003-06:00

Happy Thanksgiving, Babes!

I'm one of those people who make gratitude lists on a fairly regular basis, but I felt it was essential to write and post one today. So here goes...

super cute photo found here

The big beautiful blogosphere. Blogging has become one of my favorite things in life. Seriously. And I love reading other women's blogs just as much as (if not more than) I enjoy creating my own. Sites like A Beautiful Mess, Nik Star Was Here, Sometimes Sweet, and Pink of Perfection must be visited daily and they always give me the inspiration I need.

Hubs. I'll be honest, I've been having a very rough time the past few months. It's sad that whenever I mention this to a close friend or when an acquaintance makes a comment about all the white hairs I have sprouting from my head there's an assumption that my man is stressing me out, that there's trouble on the home front. That couldn't be further from the truth. In fact, some days I feel like my marriage is the only thing I'm getting right. My husband has been the rock that is getting me through these tough times. I am so thankful to be married to my very best friend and I feel blessed to share my life with someone who always has my back.

My small group. Despite the fact that I've been a mess this fall, I have still managed to lead a small group for my church. Each Monday night a group of 8 young women and I get together at my apartment for a bible study that's meant to help us get more out of our relationships with God, our friends and family, and even ourselves. I've watched these girls grow closer to God and form genuine friendships and I'm amazed. God really can use us to create something beautiful even when we're broken.

Here are a few girls from Black Girls Run-Birmingham and I
volunteering at the Ruben Studdard Half-Marathon

My running group. There was a time when I couldn't run for 60 seconds. Now I'm training for a half-marathon. And it's all thanks to my running group, Black Girls Run - Birmingham. Those women have been such an inspiration and running has become something I love as much as blogging. Can you believe that?!

The bad times. One of the greatest lessons I've learned during my 30 years on this third rock from the sun is that we should be grateful for the bad times. Not only do they make the good times even sweeter, but they teach us things about ourselves and oftentimes in retrospect we realize that something wonderful came from that trial or ordeal. In fact, I just wrote a little tongue-in-cheek piece about this for the latest issue of Weld. (To check it out click here and scroll down to the entry titled For the real-life demolition derby.)

The little things: Pinterest, cupcakes, my haute chocalate nail polish, my favorite blazer, fresh flowers, The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl...

My family. I have two parents who shower me with love, a little brother (who's now a grown man and bigger than I) who makes me laugh and encourages me to chase my dreams, and a cousin who's like the sister I never had and gets all my little quirks. And I am so grateful that I'm going to get to spend this day with all of them, while stuffing myself with delicious food.

What are you thankful for today?

*Crossposted at GeorgiaMae.com.

Help me, I'm 30!

2011-11-20T15:40:00.000-06:00

image via Clutch

While many people dread turning 30, early this year I was counting down the days to this monumental birthday. I was busy planning a weekend long celebration and even created a vision board representing all the things I wanted to accomplish during this glorious decade.

My birthday came, I had a great time celebrating, and I got to work on all those dreams.

Then something happened.

A few months ago I got hit with the "Oh no, I'm 30!" blues. Read my latest article for Clutch magazine to find out what sent me into this funk and how I pulled myself out.

OMG! There are black people in The Hunger Games

2011-11-15T21:38:00.003-06:00

I am quick to scoff at you Twi-hards (a.k.a. Twilighters) and I frequently make fun of Potterheads, but I have a confession: I am counting down the days to The Hunger Games movie (only 128 more to go). And I got chills when I watched the recently released trailer (below).

But my blood started boiling when I read some of the comments from people who couldn't believe that two of the main characters are *gasp* black! (Drop by Nerdgasm Noire Network to check out some examples of reactions.)

Some of you may think this is no reason to be upset. It's natural for fans to want the cast to reflect their vision of the characters. And I'll be honest, I was shocked that Cinna, who will be played by Lenny Kravitz, and Rue, who will be played by Amandla Stenberg, were black too. But instead of being appalled I was excited.

Then I asked myself why was I surprised especially considering that in the book Rue is described as having "dark brown skin and eyes." Why? Because, quite frankly, as a minority I never expect to be represented in something that's not marketed as being for "people of color." The fact that I still feel this way in 2011 makes me sad and the fact that it seems like some people think we coloreds need to stay out of their Hunger Games pisses me off.

Even though Rue is described as African-American and this has been confirmed by director Garry Ross and author Suzanne Collins, fans insist that she must be white because, as Nerdgasm Noire Network blogger states, "White people are considered the norm in society; the default person." And sometimes I worry this will never change.

Monday Motivation: On Choosing Joy

2011-11-14T06:30:00.000-06:00

There's a quote on my 2011vision board that simply reads: "Joy is a choice." I added it to my board last December hoping it would help me keep a positive attitude in tough situations faced this year. And for a few months it did. But, of course, I eventually got used to seeing that board on my bedroom wall and it began to be about as special to me as the blinds in my bedroom window.

Last week I had to work a 12-hour day as we were holding auditions for my school's black history program, of which I am the faculty sponsor. Seeing as how I was recovering from a pretty rough sickness and very tired I was not looking forward to such a long day. But that morning the "Joy is a choice" quote happened to catch my eye while I was getting dressed and I made a decision: I chose joy.

I decided I would have fun during the auditions and I did just that. It was so excited seeing students showcase their singing, dancing, and acting talents. We all had a wonderful time.

I learned a valuable lesson. My circumstances did not change. I still didn't get home until 8 p.m. I was still coughing most of the evening and I was still exhausted. But I simply changed my attitude and that made all the difference.

So no matter what the week may bring, decide today that you will choose joy.

Confessions of a Quitter

2011-11-08T07:00:00.000-06:00

image via

One week into the National Novel Writing Month challenge and I'm thinking about quitting. I need someone out there to tell me to keep going (or to give up).

The problem is I'm a quitter. When a hobby or project I'm working on stops being fun, I bail. This isn't always a bad thing. For example, if a show I love watching suddenly becomes so ridiculous *cough* Desperate Housewives *cough* that watching it begins to feel like a chore, I simply stop watching it. I'm not one of those people who has to see it through to the end. I easily cut ties with the characters and move on. And I think this is a good thing because the less time I spend watching television the more time I can spend doing something productive -- like writing a novel.

Working on this novel, however, also is suddenly no longer fun and I'm not sure what to do.

Don't get the wrong impression of me when I say I'm a quitter. I don't take this to extremes. I'm not going to serve my husband with divorce papers after a fight. And don't think I'm lazy. I teach full-time, do freelance reporting part-time, lead a small group for my church, organize a networking group for women writers in my city, exercise regularly (I'm training for a half marathon), and maintain two blogs. I'm also taking a college course online. And so I guess I'm just having trouble finding time to write and when I do sit down to work on a chapter my mind is filled with all the other things I need to be doing instead.

So what's a girl to do? Should I throw in the towel and focus on my other writing projects or forge ahead?

Blog Like a Girl: Nik G. of Nik Star Was Here

2011-10-25T20:53:00.000-05:00

Blog Like a Girl is a new feature here at The Writeous Babe Project that highlights some of my favorite babes who blog. This week we chat with Nik G. of Nik Star Was Here.

What inspired you to start Nik Star Was Here?

I initially started my blog after “discovering” some fashion blogs. I was kind of late to the game, and had no idea it was going on. I was intrigued--so I decided to start my own blog. Initially, I figured it would mostly be about fashion and outfit posts and that I would throw in some stuff regarding my change in lifestyle from party girl to wife/mom. Eventually, the lifestyle aspect became more prominent as I feel like I've been busy with life more than I get the chance to focus solely on fashion and outfits.

How did you get the word out about your blog and what advice would you give to other bloggers about keeping readers coming back once they find a blog?

As far as my following/audience--I've had an internet presence for years now. It started out with message boards (particularly hair boards), then of course Myspace gave me a big audience during its time. So, I think right away when I started the blog, I already had a group of people who right away were into it because they already "knew" me. Also, I try to make sure that I comment on other blogs that I follow. I've come to see in this blog world that "you give love--you get love."

Your posts also seem to always generate comments from your readers. What do you do to encourage that?

I actually am not sure what I do to get comments to my posts, but I'm very grateful! I'm always pretty happy to see that people want to comment or ask me questions, etc. I don't, however, obsess over it. I blog as if it's my own little diary of sorts, so whether anyone reads it or not--I'm still going to post what I want to post. I feel like you have to do it for the joy of doing it, because if you're doing it just for popularity or just to try to turn it into income that will show--not to mention, you may end up very disappointed if that doesn't happen.

Some blogging gurus say that blogs need a niche to be successful, yet you seem to have had great success with a lifestyle blog. Why do you think this has worked for you?

I do think blogs that cover a specific thing may do better. I would actually encourage someone to get a little more specific when starting a blog. I haven't necessarily done that, because from my past experience on the internet I've come to see that people seem to be interested in me in general for whatever reason. I think people like to see how other people live. I know that I do. So that's my draw. Hopefully, I can give some insight on how life changes once a woman gets married has kids while still trying to remain in touch with that piece of herself that will always be her.

My first Clutch article and why writers need Twitter

2011-10-23T10:03:00.000-05:00

If you're a lady of letters and you've been holding out on Twitter, Facebook, and the like, allow me to attempt to convince you to hop on the social media bandwagon.

One of my favorite online publications is Clutch magazine, which has been called the little sister of Essence magazine. This webzine for young women of color really speaks to my feminist beliefs, my pride in my heritage, and even my love for pop culture. Needless to say, I've been longing to freelance for Clutch since I first stumbled upon the site long ago.

And on Friday my first story for Clutch went live. My article addresses the lonely black woman narrative (you know, all those stories that claim black women are doomed to never, ever get married) and asks if this meme has the potential to not only be degrading, but also divisive, as single women start to view each other as competition and married women start to disparage women who aren't hitched.

So what does this have to do with social media? I had the opportunity to write for Clutch (and I now have the chance to write for the publication regularly) because of Twitter. I began following one of Clutch's editors on Twitter a while back. She would frequently post articles and encouraging words that really resonated with me and I would let her know by replying to her tweets. She would graciously respond even though she didn't know me from Eve.

A couple of weeks ago I decided I would ask her, through Twitter, about freelancing for Clutch. She sent me her email address (which I'd tried finding in the past to no avail) and I sent her a few story pitches. A week later my byline was on the site.

Twitter is a great way to connect with people who not only share your interests but who could also help you achieve your writing goals. But a word of caution: you should not feign interest in a person's tweets just because you want them to help you get a gig. That's lame and it will be painfully obvious. The Clutch editor mentioned above and I have many similar interests and share similar points of view on issues pertaining to black women. That's why I chose to engage with her through Twitter and that's why I would continue to follow her tweets even if she stopped working for Clutch today.

Now, go sign up for Twitter and be sure to follow me @writeousbabe.

Blog Like a Girl: Kate Spears of Southern Belle Simple

2011-10-19T06:00:00.002-05:00

I believe the best bloggers are those who read other bloggers. With that in mind, today I'm launching Blog Like a Girl, a Q&A with some of my favorite babes who blog. It's only right that I kick things off with Kate Spears of Southern Belle Simple, whom I met this summer at the skirt! Creative Conference.

What inspired you to start Southern Belle Simple?

I was feeling a little bit burned-out with my day-to-day routine and wanted an outlet for creativity. I never thought anybody would read my blog, so I was mainly just writing it for myself.

You seem to have a huge following of loyal readers. How did you get the word out about your blog and what advice would you give about keeping readers coming back once they find your blog?

This is one of those things that sometimes feels like a fluke. We don't always know why some folks end up reading our blogs. Some of my loyal readers are my family and friends. Others are bloggers I've met along the way and connected with. I've found a great deal of support from other bloggers in this growing community. We are all in this together and I love how everybody encourages each other, as opposed to competing with each other.

How did you choose your niche? Do you think having a niche has helped make your blog successful?

When I first started my blog (back in fall of 2009) it had a different name (Small Town, Big Dreams), but I couldn't figure out a way to weave what the name represented into each post. It finally dawned on me that so much of who I am (positive & negative) has been established because of my experiences growing up in the south. I knew that because my love for the south runs deep, I would never tire of writing about it. Plus I wouldn't have to reach very far to find topics to write about because it's just what I know best.

I think having a niche both helps and limits a blog. While I sometimes dream of being strictly a fashion blogger, that's not what SBS is all about so I keep posts on fashion at a minimum, unless they are specifically southern fashion oriented. As far as helping a blog be successful, I think a niche is good because it lets readers know what to expect. My readers can be sure that they will never arrive at my blog and find a post about a hot-button political issue or me ranting about some current event. These types of blogs definitely have a place as well, but that's not what I wanted mine to be.

Why do you love blogging?

I love blogging because it gives me the chance to create something each day and share it with others. Other than the act of blogging, my favorite thing about it is the connection it allows me to make with other people. I have met so many wonderful people, many that I consider real friends (including you, Ms. Javacia!).

Kate and I at the skirt! Creative Conference

How would you like to see your blog grow and evolve in the future?

I have big dreams for my blog. I'd love for Southern Belle Simple to be a household name. I'd like to publish a cookbook of my anti-recipes, for folks like me who love to cook but are sometimes intimidated by lengthy ingredients lists and complicated procedures.

That being said, I don't care if I ever make a cent from SBS because I just love it so much. I want it to be a little bright spot in a person's day. I think one day blogs will serve as important historic records...letting our descendants know what we were all about and giving them a glimpse into our daily lives.

You do a lot of posts on small businesses. Is this something that you've found has helped increase your readership and foster relationships with the community?

Writing about small businesses has been a win-win for me. One of the desires I have (which I believe is God-given) is to use my blog to help other businesses succeed. If I can do a post on a fledgling restaurant and it makes people want to eat there, I feel like I'm helping that restaurant succeed. I win as well because it provides me with content for the blog and a great excuse to try out new places and shops. We're all in this together and I feel really honored if I can help someone's business grow, even a tiny bit.

Any other words of advice for bloggers hoping to one day have the success you currently enjoy?

There are all types of blogs. Some are personal journals full of family pictures, others deliver breaking news, and others just offer a bit of loveliness in that vast space we call the interweb. I would encourage anyone who wants to blog to dive in. Write what you know and don't try to speak with a voice other than your own. God put something inside each of us that is so special, so unique. I think we are doing a disservice to that if we try to be anything other than who we are. It might sound cheesy but also don't underestimate the power of helping each other. Also never judge the quality of your blog by how many followers or comments you have. Of all the posts I've ever done (a few of which I genuinely believed were thought provoking), my most-viewed post is about homemade pimento cheese. Sometimes we just can't explain these things.

Flash Mob Fun

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Last weekend I crossed off the following item from my bucket list:

Dance in a flash mob

Don't believe me? Here's the proof. (I'm the extremely bouncy chick in the pink tank top in the middle of the center row.)

Special thanks to Jamme Morginn of Crunk Fitness for organizing this (and to Brookwood Mall for not calling the cops on us)!

Monday Motivation: Running Away From Can't

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For years I thought I couldn't be a runner. I had plenty of reasons: 1) I live in a society with stereotypes like "Black women don't run 2) I live with the memory of never being able to pass the 12-minute mile portion of the physical fitness test given in grade school and 3) I live with chronic pain thanks to a serious connective tissue disease that even has doctors convinced that I can't run.

But I run anyway.

Saturday I participated in the Susan G. Komen 5K Race for the Cure. With thoughts of those failed physical fitness tests looming I set a goal for myself to complete the run in 37 minutes or less (since 3.1 - the number of miles in a 5K - times 12 would equal 37.2 minutes). I finished in 34 minutes and 58 seconds.

Because I'm a writer to my core, I couldn't help but consider if this fitness accomplishment had any application to my artistic pursuits and I realized of course it does.

As writers how often do we tell ourselves we can't do things: I can't be a full-time freelancer because I'm not brave enough to handle such a risky endeavor. I can't publish a book because I'm not talented or connected enough. I can't start an independent magazine or alternative weekly because the economy is too bad.

After Saturday I decided that I am running away from can't. I'm not accepting it anymore in my fitness life nor in my writing life. Who's with me?

What goal would you pursue if you were to rid yourself of the "I can't" attitude?

Read more about my Race for the Cure at GeorgiaMae.com.

Fall Fitness Fun

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Photo by oObsessed via Flickr Creative Commons

Fall has been here for a few weeks now and soon cold weather will be moving in and Daylight Saving Time will be moving out. So some of you may be looking for some indoor fitness options.

Check out my latest story in Birmingham Magazine for ideas. And don't worry if you don't live in the Magic City. Many of the group fitness classes mentioned in article -- such as Pure Barre, Zumba, and Body Jam -- are offered nationwide.

If you try any of the classes, please let me know what you thought of them. Stay fit and fabulous!

Black Girls Run for the Cure

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Photo by Jessica Latten via Weld for Birmingham

As many of you know, I'm a proud member of the Birmingham chapter of Black Girls Run. Thanks to Weld for Birmingham, I was able to share my love for my running group with the entire city with my article 'Black girls run' fast and far toward better health.

Next Saturday I'll be joining several of the ladies from BGR-B'ham in the Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure. If you'd like to support my fundraising efforts, please click here to make a donation.

Scenes from See Jane Write Blogger Bash

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Thanks to all of you who came out for the first See Jane Write Blogger Bash.

We had about 20 women gather at Wine Loft for a fabulous evening of networking and noshing.

Three lucky ladies won door prizes. Thanks again to Christy Turnipseed of the Etsy shop LilSeeds and the blog Life of a Turnip for donating a lovely Vintage Book Necklace, Karri Bentley of Artistry Skin Care & Cosmetics for the grab bag of beauty goodies, and Alison Lewis of Ingredients, Inc. for the adorable t-shirt.

Some of awesome blogs represented at the bash include Stellar Fashion & Fitness, Jamie's Rabbits, B Positive Magazine, Pretty Brown & Natural, A Geek Girl, and, of course, Georgia Mae.

Thanks to Karri and Antonee for working the registration table!

Thanks to Wine Loft for creating a Blogtini for us!

Here I am with the lovely LK Whitney

Visit the See Jane Write Facebook page for more photos.